It's been a wild ride, that's for sure. I've watched friendships fade, friendships flourish, family fade, and family flourish. When I said this was a metamorphosis, I wasn't kidding. I've come a long way since February but have accepted that I still have a long way to go. To those closest to me, thank you for being patient with me and loving me through all of this pain and stress. I'm doing the best I can at the present time.
One minute I've got it all together and the next it just slips through my grasp.
Undone
Tim Blane
I wear a piece of you curved on my finger
On an otherwise plain left hand
It was the least I knew of how to remember
The place that I began
I don’t know if I should listen to logic or lose it
I know it’s just a symbol, but still…
I’m grown up somehow
I may not be the prodigal son
But don’t look now
I’m finally starting to come undone
I felt the piece of you snap under pressure
When I opened up my fist
First thing I thought of was how it would upset you
If you were here to witness this
I don’t know if I just take it for granted, But I’m used
to feeling more together than right now
Half Of It
Tim Blane
It’s guess work, it’s child’s play, but frustrates you when
You sense it, it passes and won’t come back again
You think you can taste it, an answer maybe two
Until your shouting at the sky for a signal of what to do
You feel like some days it hurts to pray
But you don’t know the half of it
Making too much noise to listen for the call back
So give God a break
Cause even if he answers you
I think you might not hear the phone ring anyway
The mind tricks, the eyes fool, the ears play along
When you’re asking for fixes to everything that’s wrong
Persistence is worth it, but listen as well
Cause you can’t hear back if you’re only inclined to yell
Even good intentions
Will leave you feeling left out
If you never take time off
Stop This Train
John Mayer
No I'm not color blind
I know the world is black and white
Try to keep an open mind but...
I just can't sleep on this tonight
Stop this train I want to get off and go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't
But honestly won't someone stop this train
Don't know how else to say it, don't want to see my parents go
One generation's length away
From fighting life out on my own
Stop this train
I want to get off and go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't but honestly won't someone stop this train
So scared of getting older
I'm only good at being young
So I play the numbers game to find away to say that life has just begun
Had a talk with my old man
Said help me understand
He said turn 68, you'll renegotiate
Don't stop this train
Don't for a minute change the place you're in
Don't think I couldn't ever understand
I tried my hand
John, honestly we'll never stop this train
See once in a while when it's good
It'll feel like it should
And they're all still around
And you're still safe and sound
And you don't miss a thing
'til you cry when you're driving away in the dark.
Singing stop this train I want to get off and go home again
I can't take this speed it's moving in
I know I can't
Cause now I see I'll never stop this train
Life will never be the same without you, but I'm trying to find my way.
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